Apology

I know many people owe many apologies, and sometimes those are not delivered. I know many of the people I owe apologies to have already forgiven me, and others don’t even think I need to apologize, but I want to. There are also those who want me to apologize for things I have not done. I will begin with those so I can end this post on a happier note. If you think you deserve an apology from me because I don’t talk to you enough, then you won’t get one because effort has to be put on both sides. What I mean is, if you don’t talk to me I won’t talk to you either because I’m tired of always putting so much effort and getting no effort in return. So if you want me to talk to you then why don’t you try talking to me first for once? To those who I have hurt I am deeply sorry. I don’t believe I am a bad person and I would never do something to purposely hurt another person. I’m sorry to those who I affected with my mood swings, I know I can get moody, and those who stand it, thank you for being there for me. I’m sorry to those who I took out my frustration on. I only did it because it’s easier to take it out on the people I love, than the people I don’t, because I know they’ll keep loving me no matter what. I’m sorry to those I hurt with my words. There is no excuse for saying something to hurt others, it happens a lot, but that doesn’t make it ok. So I’m sorry to those who I have hurt.

Music

Music is a very big part of my life. When I’m bored, I listen to music. When I’m doing math homework, I listen to music. When I’m in the car, I listen to music. Whether I’m alone or surrounded by friends, I always listen to music. But music also has a meaning to me. I listen to different kinds of music depending on my mood. Many times I also have songs that remind me of different people or bring back a memory. When I’m sad I tend to listen to sad music, where the lyrics roughly contain what is going on. When I’m happy, I listen to music I can dance to or that just has lyrics that tell happy things. Whenever I listen to a song for the first time with someone or they show me the song, I often tie that song to the person; and every time I listen to it, I am reminded of them. Another way I tie songs to people is if the song says a lot about the person or my relationship with the person. Sometimes songs can represent memories, like if I am with my friends listening to music and we are having lots of fun, that song can remind me of that memory. Other time if I am at a party, dancing or having lots of fun while a certain song is playing, every time I hear it after that I am reminded of that memory. So music is an incredible part of my life… whoever invented it was a genius! I don’t know what I would do without it.

Player

Human beings are the most complicated creatures on Earth. I happen to be in the middle of some of the most complicated of these species. One of the most complicated of these species is The Player. There is always that guy with the mysterious personal life who loves to play around with girls’ feelings. They change their mind form one day to the other and you can never really tell if they are lying. I, unfortunately very often fall for this kind of person. They use many strategies to make you fall for them, but they just drop you in the end. One example is they make you think they like you by always talking to you and complimenting you. Because you think they like you, and they make you feel good about yourself, you fall for them. Then, when they know they have you, they just stop acting like they used to, and often stop talking to you completely unless you talk to them. Many times you find out all the things they told you about how they like you are a huge lie. This has happened to me enough times for me to learn something from it. I have finally learned to not fall flat on my face when this happens, but to at least fall on my bum, where there is some cushioning. What you have to do when you encounter this kind of situation, is not give yourself in completely. Let them know you’re there and you like them, but don’t fall head over heels for them until they catch you first. Some are completely hopeless and those you just really have to stay away from. Though I have had this experience quite a few times and can tell you how to handle it a bit, I am still completely clueless about what goes on in this kind of person’s head. Maybe they think: Oh she’s attractive, I should make her like me so I can seem cooler and then just pretend I never liked her. Or maybe they want to prove themselves and think: I’m so cool already but if I can get her to like me that will just prove just how cool I am. Who know… maybe their minds really just are complicated and they change their minds that fast. But I generally advise you to go for the guys who are not like this and actually care.

Beach

I love going to the beach. It’s my favorite place to be, no matter what. It’s best when there aren’t many people around. I like going to the beach because it gives me a feeling of freedom… The vast ocean and never ending strip of sand just make it seem like I can walk forever and nothing can stop me. When it’s sunny I like to lie on the beach and tan while just thinking about how great life is. It’s also nice cool off by going for a swim and feeling the water cool my body while the waves bob me up and down. In the afternoon I like to go for long walks or just sit and look at the ocean and waves while thinking about life. If there are people around I like to just observe the word around me. I love to be with people, but when I’m on the beach I just want to be able to do whatever I want without anyone telling me I can’t do something, and I usually go with my sister and cousins because they feel very similar to me. The beach is an amazing place where I feel completely free.

No School

It was just another normal Tuesday at school, all the classes were going normally and everything was fine, right up until lunch. As the end of lunch neared more and more rumors started circling that school would be canceled for the rest of the week. No one knew for sure, and it was quite chaotic. When I got to math class the teacher advised us that the rumors were being confirmed. Due to heavy rainfall school would be canceled for the rest of the week. They school announced an assembly which was to be held during the last fifteen minutes of class. As everyone finished up their math tests we filed out of the classroom and made our way to the auditorium. Everyone was buzzing with excitement. No school! That was great! The principal announced that many states had been declared in emergency situation and ours finally had had too. Landslides were occurring everywhere with people dying and many losing houses. This was tragic but that still could not suppress the excitement. Of course we would be assigned work to do at home, but it was still like a Holliday to everyone. I enjoyed my free days, hanging out with friends, going to the movies… Doing regular teenage things. On Sunday I spent my entire day doing homework. When I finally finished I logged onto my Facebook and everyone started talking about there not being school Monday. No one knew for sure so it was crazy. Finally the school managed to send out an email to all the parents and teachers saying there would not be school on Monday or Tuesday. More Holliday!! But the bad thing was, Finals were next week so it really wouldn’t be a Holliday. All the teachers posted more work online so we could study for finals and be prepared. So that is what I spent my Monday and Tuesday… Studying.

My Friend

Well you see here’s the thing… I have this really great friend, I won’t say her name, but she is truly one of a kind. Even though she is not my bestest friend, she is definitely one of my best friends. I love her because she is understanding, patient, and supportive. She speaks her mind, even if she knows it might hurt me. She would rather have me know the truth than be deceived and hurt even more by the lie. I haven’t known her for too long, but for some reason I know she is the kind of person that won’t leave my life very soon. We didn’t exactly start off as such great friends; I had been spending a lot of time with the guy she liked and soon enough started liking him too. She, of course was not too happy about this, but she finally stopped liking him and she came to talk to me. She was honest and straight forward. She explained everything to me and I realized what a great person she is. It still took us a while to really become better friends, but once we started to get to know each other better, it went pretty fast. She has helped me with lots of my issues, which I have a lot of. And I have tried as much as possible to repay her by helping her with her issues. Thanks for being such a great friend. I love you.

Swimmer

Let me begin by saying, I am a swimmer. I do many other sports, but my best sport is swimming. Yeah sure… you mays say it’s boring, and I totally agree, but I swim anyways. It’s unexplainable; I like to swim, but not all the time. I know, you are probably thinking, what in the world is she saying? But as I said, it’s unexplainable. I swim because it keeps me fit and I am told I’m good at it. The thrill of a competition is the best part of it. As my turn approaches I sit on the bench waiting for the people to tell me where to go, feelings of nervousness pass through me. I hear my name and make my way to the block I have been assigned. I place the goggles over my eyes and look at my finishing point, the wall on the other side, while waiting for the ref. to blow the whistle, signaling to get on the block. I take a deep breath and get onto the block looking into the water, adrenaline begins to rush in and I block out all the sounds of cheering and chatting. I hear the ref. give the signal and I’m off. Adrenaline pumps through my veins and all I can think of is getting to the other side. All I can see is the bottom of the pool and I kick so hard I don’t feel my legs. I reach the wall and immediately turn to look at my time. Out of breath, I get out of the pool, but the adrenaline is still there and I’m anxious. Finally my adrenaline settles and I am back to sitting and waiting for my next race.